Controlling anger

Controlling anger

Don’t sin by letting anger control you. Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry. – Ephesians 4:26

Psalms 4:1-4

 1 Answer me when I call to you, O God who declares me innocent. Free me from my troubles. Have mercy on me and hear my prayer.

 2 How long will you people ruin my reputation? How long will you make groundless accusations? How long will you continue your lies? Interlude

 3 You can be sure that the LORD set apart the godly for himself. The LORD will answer when I call to him.

 4 Don’t sin by letting anger control you. Think about it overnight and remain silent.

Anger problems can manifest differently, from occasional outbursts to chronic and intense anger issues. Situational stressors or triggers can influence the prevalence of anger problems.

Anger management refers to the techniques, strategies, and skills that individuals can learn and practice to effectively manage their anger and respond to anger-provoking circumstances constructively and healthily. It involves developing self-awareness, understanding the underlying causes and triggers of anger, and acquiring techniques to control and express anger appropriately. The goal is to create healthier ways of dealing with anger, improving relationships, and enhancing overall emotional well-being.

Anger management typically involves the following components:

  • Self-awareness: recognizing the signs and physical sensations associated with anger.
  • Relaxation techniques: relaxation exercises like deep breathing.
  • Cognitive restructuring: identifying and challenging negative thought patterns or distorted thinking that contribute to anger.
  • Effective communication skills: developing strategies to express anger assertively and clearly without resorting to aggression or hostility. This includes active listening, using “I” statements, and expressing emotions non-confrontationally.
  • Problem-solving: identify and address the underlying issues or conflicts that contribute to anger and focus on problem-solving rather than blame.
  • Stress management: employing stress reduction techniques, such as exercise, hobbies, time management, and self-care practices.
  • Empathy and perspective-taking: cultivating empathy towards others, trying to understand their viewpoints. Empathy is about standing in someone else’s shoes, feeling with his or her heart, and seeing with his or her eyes.

The Scriptures provide excellent strategies for anger management. The guidelines also warn about uncontrolled anger’s dire collateral damage.

All anger is not inappropriate. All anger is not sin. Ephesians 4:26 “Reminds us that not all anger is sinful. There is a holy anger against sin that ought to be in the heart of every believer (Mark 3:5), but we must be careful not to be guilty of unholy anger” (Wiersbe).

The children of the King are not to allow themselves to be consumed by anger.

Ephesians 4:26-27

 26 Don’t sin by letting anger control you. Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry,

 27 for anger gives a foothold to the devil.

All anger is not the same. Anger exists along a continuum from mild to extreme. It may manifest as frustration, irritation, or seething, explosive, murderous rage. Or, it may arise anywhere in between.

What does anger actually accomplish? Uncontrolled anger is an exercise in futility. Stop kidding yourself. Short tempers and thoughtless words only stir up strife.

Proverbs 15:1 A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare.

The Father provided an object lesson. He gave us two ears but only one mouth. We are capable of controlling our reactions. Be sensible. Engage your intellect and develop strategies to overcome useless, futile responses to actual or perceived offenses.  


James 1:19 You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.

Father thank You for providing methods for effectively dealing with and defusing anger. Enable me to look within myself, discover my challenges and learn to overcome them effectively.


Anger is a natural response to life’s upheavals and disappointments. But as children of the King, we are admonished not to allow anger to control us. We are to pause and ponder the situation and choose to find peace amidst chaos and serenity in the face of adversity.

Overall, Psalms 4:4 urges individuals to approach God with reverent fear, to reflect on their actions, and to be silent and attentive to their inner selves. The goal is to align their hearts with the righteousness of a God-centered life. In Psalms 4, David’s enemies are in view. He is not speaking to godly or righteous people inclined to do the right thing. He cautions them against inappropriate and damaging behavior.

Psalms 4:4 Don’t sin by letting anger control you. Think about it overnight and remain silent.

LXX Psalms 4:4 Be angry, and sin not; feel compunction upon your beds for what you say in your hearts.

The Hebrew word rendered as anger is ragaz. The primary meaning of ragaz is to quake, shake, or tremble. Over time the semantic domain expanded to include rage, quaking with fear, getting excited t excited or agitated, behaving violently, quivering, or experiencing great anger. It could be accurately translated as, do not sin by letting anger control you.

On the one hand, it is the idea of trembling, standing in awe of God, and getting a better perspective. “Tremble and do not sin” conveys a sense of wonder and reverence towards God.

On the other hand, is the idea of great anger. David admonishes people to consider their ways and cool off. To avoid sin, they must ponder, reflect, and remain silent rather than lashing out.

It is often easier to be critical of the sins committed by others while overlooking our own transgressions, as the Lord Jesus Christ taught in Matthew 7:1-5. Instead of tossing and turning in bed, consumed by the actions of others, take a moment to reflect and take inventory of your own heart. Are there sins that need to be addressed within you? Look inward and seek to rectify any shortcomings that you may find.”

The phrase “When you are on your beds” invites profound introspection. It implies taking the time to honestly evaluate your inner thoughts, desires, and intentions before the Father. Let the outside world disappear, and allow your inner voice to rise above the noise.  

The mention of “When you are on your beds” beckons one to engage in deep introspection. It is an opportunity to let go of the external distractions and let the world around fade away, creating space for your inner voice to resonate above the clamor. This verse implies the importance of dedicating time to honestly assess your inner thoughts, desires, and intentions in the presence of God, acknowledging Him as the ultimate authority over your heart and life.

David’s adversaries should allow their emotions to cool down. If they feel the need to be angry, it should be for a just cause. The statement “Be angry and do not sin” is quoted in Ephesians 4:26, but in that context, it is directed toward the children of the King. It serves as a reminder that it is acceptable to be angry on behalf of the Father’s righteousness, but never for personal reasons. However, in Psalms 4, these words are spoken to wicked individuals, warning them against letting their anger spill over into violent actions. During the stillness of the night, as they lie awake, they should examine their own hearts and consider the foolishness of fighting against the Father. Such thoughtful contemplation would silence their slanderous words and end their wicked schemes (BBC).


© Dr. H 2023

One thought on “Controlling anger

  1. Thank you for giving us these “tools” for anger management…without our wonderful POWER SOURCE …the tools may keep us from” growing up unto all things in Christ.”

    A “Teacher” for God’s Word reminded me this …we must know that Jesus has called us to be Disciples…and not called to be Believers and that the power source is our HOLY SPIRIT”…have soo desired this verse in The Amplified Bible Classic Edition….

    “Those who are motivated by the flesh only pursue what benefits themselves. But those who live by the impulses of the Holy Spirit are motivated to pursue spiritual realities. For the sense and reason of the flesh is death, but the mindset controlled by the Spirit finds life and peace.”
    ‭‭Romans‬ ‭8‬:‭5‬-‭6‬ ‭TPT‬‬
    ……. Thank U Dr H


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